Ok--
If it weren't for the death of my Father, I probably would have no relationship with my Mother at all. Whilst Dad was dying that week, my Brother told me a lot of home truths. Since then he has continued to work hard at us being very close. He can advise me without telling me what to do, and loves me even when I don't like his advice. It is his intervention that brought Mom and I together. I frankly had had enough. However I should tell you that she has and still does very nice things for me. I cannot ever deny that. Also, she is a much better parent than she had.
But let me give you some examples. My Mom is like Judge Judy. If it don't sound right, it isn't true.I have had some opportunities she never had, and so they seemed like something I had made up. Fr example I would not take off my beanie when I was making my Confirmation. I slept in it one night and it got lost in the bedclothes. Finally she came in my room because it was time to leave for church. She sees me in my Confirmation dress, looking for the red beanie. It took her two seconds to tell me I had to lose the dress, and off we left for church. Upon entering church Father Kennedy told the congregation he had asked us to wear the outfits to church to show we were not ashamed of being identified with Christ.
I had bigger worries, i didn't know where my beanie was and the Bishop was coming. No dress on in church would be the least of it. Thankfully when I got home I found the headpiece, and for the most part the rest of the day went ok. Our relationship could be so much more if she only trusted me. If I mess up, ok, who doesn't, but I need a chance to show I can do right first.
Lately I have felt very alone. I do not feel like myself, whatever that means. My smarter half told me to forget everyone else and figure out who I am, and what I want.
Well , who I am is gonna be complicated and he won't be amused. I am someone who wants him to learn to think for himself, especially when I need help around the house. He may rue the day he gave me my independence. I intend to fly with it. We shall see.Remember I haven't actually talked to my Mother yet, and I hope I will be this brave to her face, though I don't feel a need to be unkind. Just firm in regards to me.Here we go, I made God a lot of promises this am in church. Those are the promises I most want to keep. I walked in wanting someone out of my life and left glad they were my friend.
I am so weird, wish me luck. The odd thing is, I think my Mom would support me if I were someone else's kid.
God bless.
If it weren't for the death of my Father, I probably would have no relationship with my Mother at all. Whilst Dad was dying that week, my Brother told me a lot of home truths. Since then he has continued to work hard at us being very close. He can advise me without telling me what to do, and loves me even when I don't like his advice. It is his intervention that brought Mom and I together. I frankly had had enough. However I should tell you that she has and still does very nice things for me. I cannot ever deny that. Also, she is a much better parent than she had.
But let me give you some examples. My Mom is like Judge Judy. If it don't sound right, it isn't true.I have had some opportunities she never had, and so they seemed like something I had made up. Fr example I would not take off my beanie when I was making my Confirmation. I slept in it one night and it got lost in the bedclothes. Finally she came in my room because it was time to leave for church. She sees me in my Confirmation dress, looking for the red beanie. It took her two seconds to tell me I had to lose the dress, and off we left for church. Upon entering church Father Kennedy told the congregation he had asked us to wear the outfits to church to show we were not ashamed of being identified with Christ.
I had bigger worries, i didn't know where my beanie was and the Bishop was coming. No dress on in church would be the least of it. Thankfully when I got home I found the headpiece, and for the most part the rest of the day went ok. Our relationship could be so much more if she only trusted me. If I mess up, ok, who doesn't, but I need a chance to show I can do right first.
Lately I have felt very alone. I do not feel like myself, whatever that means. My smarter half told me to forget everyone else and figure out who I am, and what I want.
Well , who I am is gonna be complicated and he won't be amused. I am someone who wants him to learn to think for himself, especially when I need help around the house. He may rue the day he gave me my independence. I intend to fly with it. We shall see.Remember I haven't actually talked to my Mother yet, and I hope I will be this brave to her face, though I don't feel a need to be unkind. Just firm in regards to me.Here we go, I made God a lot of promises this am in church. Those are the promises I most want to keep. I walked in wanting someone out of my life and left glad they were my friend.
I am so weird, wish me luck. The odd thing is, I think my Mom would support me if I were someone else's kid.
God bless.
good luck Brenda :)
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