Thursday 9 August 2012

A grain of rice

Well in my never ending adventure to know every aspect of parts of my body I didn't want to know I had...today Nurse Carol adjusted medicine I am taking for my Para-thyroids. NO smarty pants, those are not mini hemorrhoids. My thyroid gland hides 4 mini glands the size of a grain of rice. Small as they are, they seem to do a lot when they work, unlike mine, and affect my bone density,depression, etc. among other things. Either i am taking the wrong thing or the wrong amount, so Carol has discussed this with Dr Paddy on my behalf. Apparently even though he is assigned to the renal unit, he does not have time to actually "talk" to the patients he works for.

Now we have two people in our renal "club" who have had amputations this month. SO I know the doctors are very busy, but between a surgery in Linwood stuck in the dark ages, and an uncaring physicians staff in the hospital renal unit, I am beginning to feel like a bit of a bother. What I am not feeling is as good as I should with all the toxins being removed by a machine. What I am not feeling is enough energy to hoover and do dishes the same day. I felt better when i was refusing all pills whatsoever. I am dizzy again, and my balance had been improving.

OK here is the real thing. They shuffled drivers again. There is nothing wrong with our new driver. He is a nice man. I miss David our previous driver. He talked rugby non-stop, and about his kids and a million interesting things. He even liked Maurette. Now suddenly one morning he is gone. No explanations, no nothing. He is simply gone. Again we are part of a vast system and no one thinks we have any feelings. I do not care how i get to the hospital, honestly. But just to know he quit, or was fired or had a brain tumor or something. He disappeared like a bad magicians bunny. As did Phil and Pete, and in the 2 years I have dialyzed i have had many drivers.

Yup I am a bit angry. They talk about me being a member of my chronic care team, but in fact i am a number(literally i have a number on the system), and they don't have time to care. SO on it goes, and I am kept alive by chemicals and machines. I am literally becoming a $6 million dollar girl. Now can I have my life back?

Blessings.

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