ok
if i seem a little delirious, JIm is coming home today. That seems like such a small statement, but it is everything to me. The last week alone was not as easy as last time, and next week he is off overnight again. Molly won't eat and I won't stop. Cereal and milk are not the best choice for me at this time in this heat. I am making bad choices cause I know no one will catch me.
The nurses offered to up my dry weight the other day. What that basically means is the last time they thought that was as fat as I would let myself get, now i have surpassed it again. I can't let them up it, as that then this new weight seems like a new goal to reach. I am gonna have to learn a new word. NO.My options are thinning out.NO.they are gone altogether. I have let this pity party over my kidneys go on long enough. NO means no more excuses. Jim jokes about the hotel force feeding him.That is not my problem, after not being able to eat for over a year, everything tastes good to me, even foods i traditionally dont like.
Dare I say it? Yup, i am a glutton just now. That i can stop. I cannot control my medical condition, but i can control what i put down my own throat.
July 1 the new dawn breaks.
Blessings.
if i seem a little delirious, JIm is coming home today. That seems like such a small statement, but it is everything to me. The last week alone was not as easy as last time, and next week he is off overnight again. Molly won't eat and I won't stop. Cereal and milk are not the best choice for me at this time in this heat. I am making bad choices cause I know no one will catch me.
The nurses offered to up my dry weight the other day. What that basically means is the last time they thought that was as fat as I would let myself get, now i have surpassed it again. I can't let them up it, as that then this new weight seems like a new goal to reach. I am gonna have to learn a new word. NO.My options are thinning out.NO.they are gone altogether. I have let this pity party over my kidneys go on long enough. NO means no more excuses. Jim jokes about the hotel force feeding him.That is not my problem, after not being able to eat for over a year, everything tastes good to me, even foods i traditionally dont like.
Dare I say it? Yup, i am a glutton just now. That i can stop. I cannot control my medical condition, but i can control what i put down my own throat.
July 1 the new dawn breaks.
Blessings.
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