I hate the new blog template

Since they changed so much f my blog site, I cannot find anything and it just makes it impossible to get my thoughts  out as I search for each tab hoping I can figure out what it does.

 It even hides part of my sentence,so checking my punctuation and spelling is more difficult as well as getting the flow going, from my heart to my fingers. I hate it. I wish i had had a choice.

The Early Bird is Tired.

Last night, despite diluting my fresh orange with water, my burning stomach and Jims restlessness means I got about 4 hours sleep.when Jim woke up, he suggested we go to get the shopping done before it crazy busy. So we did. After that we got a breakfast takeaway from McDonald's, came home, ate, put grceries away , folded dry laundry off line, and emptied and refilled the dishwasher.
The washing machine is about to start and it is dead on 8am. I am exhausted and soon headed back for a nap. What a day. I will miss seeing it.
Blessings.

The friendly Gull

Quite a while ago my cat adopted the window ledge in my kitchen to gaze out at the flying food we call gulls. They are dirty and messy little rodents to us, but we look too. One gull trained me to come to the window when he tapped with his bill. My rental agreement with Linstone took that away as well. It seems every year we pay more rent, and every year there is less and less fun in housing. We are not allowed to hang lovely things in our common area, we cannot feed the birds, there is no assigned handicapped parking though many in our building need the assistance, temporarily or long term.

But speaking of them or to them does no good so i will get back to topic. My gull friend Glynis still catches my eye and waits for the stale bread and popcorn from the glory days of old. She now notices the cat, although i am not sure what she perceives him to be. Perhaps in her birdy life she has encountered such meat eating meanies, I do not know.

Molly's concern is the bird is larger than her and perches too near Molly's Dreamies (a cat treat). Somehow they feel threatened by each other and the ancient bird versus cat drama commences. I take no pleasure in reporting Molly usually blinks first. Sometimes she gets brave if i am there, but not enough to even intimidate the bird. Now i should not be telling you this, because death and destruction may ensue if Linstone finds out. It seems a criminal bird element went after garbage that was left sitting outside. We were told what days and hours to leave it, but people being people...

It is also rumored that some cars may have gotten bird poo on them. Shock horror! One nailed my door handle so well you could not get in the car without wiping it. Well, so I mindlessly comply knowing I am not well enough to move again just now. I am sure the lower floors get even much lovelier singing birds, but when you live on the eighth floor you get the gull you get. Oh and every hour a plane landing in Glasgow airport. I am being kind here, they really don't take that long to land and then the next one appears. Whatever promises the airport made to local neighbors it lied. No one cares, we all need the planes, but they did.

Well we shall see how this pans out over time. I thought long ago the bird would tire of his visiting, but itis some company for poor Molly left alone most of Mon, Wed, and Friday. Thanks for visiting yourself, and have a good Thursday.

Blessings

Paver Stones

Camden Cycle Riders is in charge of orders for Paving stones for a Memorial walk in Camden. I will probably never get to see this thing, but what a monument to the future. I applaud whoever thought of a memorial that would not rise up. I also like the idea that the stones will be arranged pretty randomly I imagine, so I have no idea who will be in my row or section.

One stone is for my Dad, and that goes without saying. He is my link to Camden and how i came to be there. Oddly enough he also linked a whole family of Delarm's who would never had come, if he had not married my Mother.

Speaking of Delarms, and I often do, George Delarm, the Mayor of Main Street and proprietor of the Corner House Tavern, is my other stone. He had no children of his own, but to my brother and I, he was a second Father. Do these stones say they were perfect, far from it, nor am I. They say we are part of the fabric for a time that made Camden what it is today.  Those who came before us made a path, and those who come after will leave  there mark on it for better or worse as they see fit. Camden is an eternal tapestry and no one family made her the Queen village. No man is an island, and no one stays forever. I miss Bill Yerdon, I miss Barb Reed, I miss Mr Parker my history teacher. I also honour the Oneida tribe who walked here when it was not even Scriba Patent yet.
So many and all of them shaped us in their time and way. I and my cousins are scattered to the winds now, but I am part of something bigger than my own short life. I am a community. I am Camden. I belong, even here in Scotland. Part of me is forever where my people live, loved and lie buried. Time flows on. Thanks Frank Bergin for all your help. You are part of what makes Camden great now.
Blessings

what the heck is self-defense, actually, (legally)

I read other peoples blogs, especially my husband Jim's. He is not as frivolous as I am, and (unless its the rugby) he usually has to be angry to create it. I don't mean the anger of the crazy second Amendment Americans, I mean it is usually socially or morally unjust.


As I am getting back into my writing, I really only have to check my email or watch the news and I have a topic. I am trying to decide for myself if i want to broach two topics just now. One is the newly begun trial of the Norway madman who feels killing 77 children was self-defense, and the arrest of Zimmerman in the Trayvon Martin death.


I want a few more facts. First of all,in the Zimmerman case the whole truth may never come out. It is hard to say what an individual might call self-defense. The point I have to overcome is the 911 call, where he was told to stand down the cops have it.


And secondly, in the Norway killing I am not as familiar with their laws. On the one hand the deaths look cold and calculating, but i don't know what counts as criminally insane there. I think one has to be a wee bit insane to be able to do what he did, but to claim self-defense as Zimmerman tried, again define self-defense to an individual. So I am gonna table these till I get a few more facts and less media insanity.  
Thanks for letting me get that off my chest. Here we go with the justice system, hope the wheels don't fall off.


Blessings, today for Trayvon, and the families in Norway trying to get justice for their own. Lord, we pray for clarity and wisdom to rule.

Wild Woman Again

Yesterday I got up at 7:30, one hour before i had asked Jim to wake me.
I went to church at Hope Hall and then on to the last under 16's game Paisley v Whitecraigs. After that Jennifer, Scott, Jim and I did some errands and then they come over to ours. All in all a perfect day.Bless then, they didnt notice the unmade bed, the hoover needing done, and the piles of laundry to be ironed. They didn't gripe that we bought KFC instead of cooking a proper Sunday lunch, or that the salad came in a bag.
See, they were not there for house inspection, they were there to see us.I love them.
Blessings.

heavy hearted...

a line from the constitution i have always liked is
"We hold these truths to be self-evident"
That said to me that some truths are not only real but should be obvious to every thinking man or woman. Over a year ago, God called me away from a church where most of my friends attended. It was a kind of social club to me, and I was looking for a church of God, where his word was taught and I could grow as I felt myself getting stagnant. After awhile I could no longer even understand my Pastors accent. I was literally bored in church.


Then at the new church (which i joined) i went back after a brief bout with JIm and i sharing the flu. A visitor was preaching, and i was dead bored, as was JIm. Then something was mentioned that the church had agreed to let the elders handle. It had happened during my absence so i knew it was nothing i had done, so i dropped it. I am proud to say, it was resolved and no one ever came to me about it, although i am a member. I trust my pastor and elders and knew if I needed to know more, i would get a letter through the post, as I did when there were no nominations for a new elder post we need to fill. I was then absent again for phase two of the bug so i do not know how they determined to resolve it, but it is resolved. The reason I know it is resolved is that there is a new person at communion.
Last night my old church group was doing outreach in my building. One of the persons, a personal friend of mine,dropped by again as she had last week.Now I love her, but i feel i was a crutch so she didnt have to go to a strangers house and risk rejection. I hope i am wrong, but if i am not wrong, it means they think there is some possible way i might go there even to visit. What is the phrase? "cold day in hell?"yup.
On a chat room a fellow named Allurgator spent a lot of time trying to get me to see how bad it was that I had married an unbeliever. Now he is with a married woman and says it is ok because he is celibate. My Bible says avoid the very appearance of evil. I think that is so we don't cause another to stumble.anyway, there is so many things wrong in the local church and in Paltalk that i think I have just wasted my life talking to them about Jesus. I may have missed Gods will and led some down the path they are on now. My heart is broken. 
My church i joined also has issues and problems. The difference I see is that they confront them openly, and I don't get details I don't need. Win-win for us all. Now if Eric was just a more interesting guest preacher, my life would be complete.
I believe the truth is self-evident to those who are seeking the truth.
Blessings

You don't know what people notice.

There is a place near me where one of the dialysis patients i ride with lives. We really have a long ride in, a longer wait to go home, and a long ride home. I leave my house at 6:50 am, and we get to the hospital just before 8. All we have to entertain us on these long rides is conversation and what we see out our window. Our driver is a cheery chap, but we are not going to a fun place and sometimes we give up the pretense, and just sit quietly.

Well this woman i refer too takes a while to be put in the car, so I have observed a house across the street. It had a lovely ivy of some sort growing high and so wide it blocked a wee window. But now the sun is up so early mornings, this green vertical garden hosted a bajillion birds. My driver joked that it must be hard to sleep in that house when the birds wake up.

Friday the 13th we did everything the same as we always do, but there was something wrong. The birds were very agitated and chirping and flying all over. I turned to get a better view from my car
window and to my surprise i noticed the house was an ugly grey stone looking like cement. The beautiful hedge is gone, and it seems the family may be considering painting their home. This is certainly correct to do as it is their house, but I wonder if they know what they have done?

My morning ritual of enjoying the ivy and the birds is gone, but i move on with my day. Where will all these birds nest now? Will they even make another nest?

True, it is not our house, and their is only about 5 minutes twice a day i see the growth. All that aside, I wonder if that family realized what a boost that was to our day, to start out looking at that greenery.It spoke to me of Spring, and rebirth and natures way of starting over.

Am I Silly,yes, and are children still dying in the Sudan? YES.
But a bit of me was ripped out this week too, just wanted to say...
Blessings...

100 things to ...

My son today posted 100 things to eat before you die. I have seen on tv 100 things to see before you die..., and it seems to me one thing we can all agree on, one day we will all die. Ok, no shock there. The bible says some mens hearts stop for fear and I wonder what they fear. If there is a God all is well, and f not, well my practicing being like Jesus only hurt me. Win win.


I suggest a new list, 100 things to do to prevent death and despair of poor health. The younger you start it the better. Lett's face it, if you are still smoking you are not even playing the game. No question, noting good about that in any way. Buck up, love your family and quit. In addition, I do not know many that could not stand to lose a stone. If you drink more than three drinks on an afternoon, (before you go out) you are not paying attention. Listen to your body. Listen to your Doctor,even if he is sad and more overweight than you,(Dr Anderson).
If you are lonesome a cat or dog is good company and need a lot of attention, fed, watered, walked, played with, etc. They don't try to analyze you, they just love ya and want treats!


Ok, thats enough guilt for now, what would you add to the list? I think between us we can exceed 100. Let's see.

Maya Angelou defines her faith

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not shouting "I'm clean livin."
I'm whispering "I was lost,"
Now I'm found and forgiven.

When I say..."I am a Christian"
I don't speak of this with pride.
I'm confessing that I stumble
and need CHRIST to be my guide.

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not trying to be strong.
I'm professing that I'm weak
and need HIS strength to carry on.

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not bragging of success.
I'm admitting I have failed
and need God to clean my mess.

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not claiming to be perfect,
My flaws are far too visible
but, God believes I am worth it.

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I still feel the sting of pain,
I have my share of heartaches
So I call upon His name.

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not holier than thou,
I'm just a simple sinner
who received God's good grace, somehow.

Author ~Maya Angelou~

I Miss Easter

Although Jim has promised to go to church with me today, I still have this heaviness in my heart. It is Resurrection Day, and i watched the Passion of the Christ, so Easter is my favorite and holiest day of my year. It is my traditions I miss. Family, driving to St John's. waving to Aunt Sheila and Mark on the porch. Seeing Marguerite and various members of her family, and all my school friends that go to Catholic mass.

Then as an adult, following Fred to whatever church he was playing that Sunday, then a trip to the massive Onofaro gathering, usually at Louis and Glorias. At this gathering there were children of all ages, and I remember it was pure fun. I remember one year they had a trivial pursuit contest, and they said i had memorized the cards because none of them thought I was that clever. AND CONNOLIS and Easter pie.

Holidays without family is pretty worthless. No one to fight with and say which one Mom liked best, and who was spoiled, and very little talk of whatever holiday it actually was, but catching up on the lives of eighty-eight cousins. So Jim will go with me, and we have a nice steak for later. But i would be lying if I said this was a family day now, but at least i have my best friend.

Oops, and Jesus.
Happy Easter.

This is the beginning again

Last year during Holy Week I posted a bit more than now. You see, Easter snuck up on me. I was out soaking up the sun. I even skipped church to sit at the Rugby Club and bake. Do I feel no need to go to church, not exactly, but this is Scotland and sure enough today there was snow.Easter is a better holiday in my opinion than Christmas. I don't fret over gifts, and I don't have to make time for parties-though Easter Sunday deserves the greatest of thanks.

Anyhoo, whether you are traveling or hosting family and friends, I pray this year you get a whole new perspective on love and sacrifice-the Easter story.
Blessings

Did no one read Fahrenheit 451?

It should be a federal offense to burn any book, words aren't dangerous, people are.


I am going to keep this simple for those who believe in the Constitution still. Despite our history of wars, civil war and 9/11. I believe the path to peace is more and more words, not limiting the first amendment. The old saw"I may hate what you say, but will defend to the death your right to say it", is one of the most beautiful string of words put together in human history.


Go not burn Bibles, do not burn the Quaran, do not tear down opponent political posters, do not burn hatred into your children's minds. Ever. No matter what. I am embarrassed by some of my parents values, but in the midst of the ignorance and religious and other racism, I was allowed to become myself. Maybe I am just as warped in my views, but I was allowed to form them. 


It should be a federal offense to burn any book, words aren't dangerous, people are.